World's most overpriced digital camera?

We spent a lot of time and money obtaining an iPhone for Barry. It was his birthday/father's day/anniversary/Flag Day/will-refer-him-back-to-this-at-all-future-holidays-when-I-have-no-money present. I was skeptical about spending so much on a phone. Then I saw these pictures which we were only able to capture due to having an iPhone at the ready.

Anyone wanna come over for a really, really big omelet?

Stop dressing me like a boy, mommy.

Who, me? It was totally like this when I found it.

I CANNOT WAIT TO EAT YOU.

Wasted.

I don't know if you know this, but I'm kind of a big deal

I got an email from our Senator inviting me to dinner at his house. (We're best buds ever since I welcomed him at my home.)

Ok, so maybe other people were invited too. But he took a mass e-mail he had sent to all of his volunteers and forwarded it specifically to me. So I'm kinda special.

"I would be honored if you would join me and enjoy a summer evening with good friends and, of course, grilled ears of corn."

Well thank goodness. Because I'm only comin' if there's grilled ears of corn.

Actually, I cannot come at all as I will be out of town. Perhaps he would be willing to reschedule?

44 down

Now that I've been to Maine I only have six states left to see. In the order I expect to visit them, they are:

• Wisconsin
• Oregon
• Montana
• Wyoming
• Idaho
• Alaska

Marielle played with daddy at the Maine Children's Museum while mommy was hard at work across the street:

More to come on my impressions of Maine. Spoiler alert: I may move there one day, once global warming has kicked in to take care of those pesky cold winters.

I just got paid $72 to write this

This is by far the best conference I have ever produced or even attended. At first I thought it was because I am so amazing and after 10 years in the business have finally figured it all out. Alas, that's not it (though I'm sure that must be SOME of it, right?).

Here's why:

The attendees are so gracious. Even the people who had to call me three times before I managed to call them back stopped by to thank me for all my help. Only one grumpy guy out of 230 is not bad, and he was only mildly crotchety.

It's the last day and everyone but me is wearing jeans or shorts. Even the other staff!!

This hotel is not the Ritz. In fact it's barely a 3 star hotel. But they have free wireless and a free business center (free copies, free printing, free computer use, etc) which means attendees have a lot less to complain about. Two people can eat a huge room service breakfast for under $15! (Also you can order room service online to be delivered anywhere in the hotel.) Did I mention we're staying in Maine at high season for $103/night? Not bad.

The view from our room

Vera Wang is here. No, not the Vera Wang. But you can bet I checked when I was printing the badges.

The staff helping me is fantastic. If they are not busy telling me what a fantastic job I did, they are helping me however they can. One meeting today needed an extra table and chairs. I started calling the banquets department when three staff chimed in "We'll help!" In under two minutes the four of us picked up a table and four chairs, reset the hollow square and the meeting was back on track. I work at very few meetings where this would happen.

No floods. (The universe owes me.)

Even the homeless people are helpful. Maine gives 5 cents back on plastic bottles. That means you don't even have to look for a recycling bin - though they are plentiful - as the homeless guys roaming the halls will grab the bottles right out of the trash. (Ok, so waking up to a homeless guy right outside your hotel room door is a bit weird at first. But you get used to it.)

Everybody loves Marielle. I have tried to keep her away, except the party where I dressed her like a lobster and showed her off, but everyone keeps asking about her and wanting to play with her. At one point I was even nursing her at the registration desk and no one cared. (I know!!!!! Crazy, right? And yes, I was totally covered up.)

The attendees also appreciate Monica-style conferences and parties. I brought various theme decorations for the conference. I asked if they would be too unprofessional and was told absolutely not. Everyone keeps coming by to admire my work, and complimenting my decor which changes daily.

Should you ever do a conference revolving around fish or aquatic life, here are some of the secrets to my success:

1. Buy sand pails. Fill with various snack items daily: swedish fish, goldfish crackers, goldfish pretzels, swedish fish aqua life, etc. Most hotels won't let you order your own. This hotel pretended not to notice.

2. On the first day, put a foil covered chocolate fish at everyone's seat in the general session.

3. Leave memorable gifts for the hotel staff that helped you.

4. Bring adorable baby. Dress in costume more than once.

5. Buy floating fish shaped candles at Crate and Barrel outlet just because. Six years later, find use for them at conference as centerpieces.

6. Rejoice in your awesomeness.

We are so screwed

Taken on Barry's iPhone this morning:

Why are you weeping, mommy?

Overheard in Portland

Conference attendee: "Oh my gosh! Look!!!! You are quoted on seafood.com!!!" (You would have thought she saw Jesus she was so excited.)

Girl on the street: "You certainly are gayed out today."
Extremely sunburned guy: "Well, I did spend the whole day kayaking."

Attendee looking at a long line of youngsters in the hotel lobby: "What's going on here today? Is that American Idol tryouts?"
Me: "Um, no, that's the Maine bar exam."
Attendee: "I feel old."

I am liking Portland a lot, except for the jerk (not an attendee, but some other passerby) that stole our stuffed clown fish. If I see those fish on the streets of Portland, I see a big ass whooping in someone's future.

Signs of neglect

Four thumbs up. We loved this place! If you plan to go and want to fit in, be sure you take a very pregnant woman with you. It's the latest must-have accessory at Glen Echo.

What is mommy thinking?

Yes, driving seems like a much safer activity.

Tastes like chicken.

I can fly!

Thanks to NG for the awesome photography!

Miss Photogenic

Self portrait.

Playing my family's favorite game: how many chins can you make?

Proof that I wasn't lying about the teeth.

Time out

I'm currently mediating between our nanny and my husband hoping to find a solution that works for all of us. One is being overly sensitive and irrational. The other is being overly sensitive and irrational.

If it doesn't work, it's going to be real lonely around here with no husband.

Internal dialogue

Me: I'm soooo tired. When am I going to have time to take a nap?

Me: Um, not today, too much work to do before leaving tomorrow. Maybe on the plane if Barry holds the baby?

Me: But that's only an hour, and you will be up all night working because you know you always wait until the last second to do everything and once you finish working, you will have to pack. So you need way more than an hour to sleep to catch up on all the sleep you will lose tonight. Tomorrow you have to work as soon as you get to Portland. Monday you have to work 6 am to 9 pm with no break...and...Thursday. You can relax at 3 pm on Thursday.

Me: Uuuuuuuuuuugh.

And the winner is...

The lobster was by far the favorite choice. I found a lobster costume that was almost as cute for half the price of the first one I picked out. When you're paying $35 for overnight shipping, you have to economize.

Now I just need to find some red tights, and talk myself out of ordering a costume for each of the days we are gone.

VOTE NOW

I don't know why I didn't think of this sooner. Barry & Mari are joining me in Maine next week. The conference we're going to is about water, and fish/animals that live in the water.

Leave me a comment by noon Thursday indicating which costume I should purchase for Marielle. I just cannot make up my mind, and without your assistance in deciding may just end up ordering ALL OF THEM.

This is so going to be worth the overnight shipping. (Unless of course someone has one they would like to let me borrow?)

1. 2. 3.
4. 5. 6.
7.

Inappropriate!

A mommy friend told me that our local theater shows Mommy & Me movies on Thursday mornings. They set up changing stations, have stroller parking, leave the lights partially on, etc etc. It's very baby friendly and only $6.25! There's even a free hour of gymboree before hand, though not likely we would get our act together and make it there by 9 am.

Even though I'm working today I thought I would take a look at the website to see what I was missing. Especially since my mommy friend said, "Yeah, I go every week but this week is a thriller and I'm not really into that, so I'm gonna skip this week."

Joshua
The arrival of a newborn girl causes the gradual disintegration of the Cairn family; particularly for 9-year-old Joshua (Kogan), an eccentric boy whose proper upbringing and refined tastes both take a sinister turn.

Somebody has a really twisted, sick sense of humor.

I'm so bummed I'm working. It would be worth $6.25 just to see the reaction of the other moms.

Mystery solved

I finally figured out who Linda is!!!!!!!!!!! And by figured out, I mean another stranger just happened to mention her in a phone conversation. I was so excited that I immediately went to update the blog with the great news and FORGOT I WAS ON THE PHONE. (It was on speaker.) After about 30 seconds of typing I hear the man say, "Hello? Hello? Um, was that all you needed?"

Unfortunately it's nothing exciting. She's not some wealthy widow leaving me her fortune, she just works in accounts receivable for one of my customers. Boo.

It's not all bad

I'm prematurely arthritic from all the typing I've done in the last few days. I don't wish to add to the problem with a long blog post about how tired and busy I am getting ready for my conference next week and whine whine whine. Instead I will let your imagination fill in the blanks. Here is a picture to ponder. Details to follow.

Despite all my complaining there are some things I do at work that I absolutely love.

Don't you wish he taught your kid's kindergarten class?

How is it that I spent half the weekend on the phone with family members and no one mentioned THIS:


Instead, I had to discover it on facebook. (No, of course I don't have a profile on that juvenile site. My dog does, and he lets me use his.)

Marielle, your uncle is not only prematurely bald, but prematurely off his rocker.

Updates - 7 month and misc

Monthly updates
Today is Marielle's seven month birthday!

I feel like we are in the best stage possible, though seems like every month I feel that way and then the next month proves me wrong. She can now sit on her own, which she couldn't do last month. She stays up for long periods of time, but still cannot move from one spot. (And I am not encouraging crawling in the least, as I'm enjoying not having to childproof yet.) Can't beat that!

We have teeth!! And hair!! Hair that even has little curls now and then. Her favorite toys are the extra computer keyboard and tivo remote that I let her play with. She still loves her instruments, but not quite as much as that remote.

I miss Mari's 100% milk diet, as feeding her solid foods requires me to do laundry three times as often. We also have to take a lot more baths. Gone are the days when we could wait two or three (or six or seven...) days between baths. Now she gets at least one a day. She splashes with such force that she drenches herself, me, the people in the next county...

Marielle still enjoys - or at least tolerates - my home cooking. Prunes are still one of her favorites, though whole milk yogurt has taken over the #1 spot. I enjoy cooking most of her baby food and creating concoctions that sneak veggies into her (e.g. peaches and carrots). She has not appreciated my attempts to add texture to her diet. Shredded chicken and pureed vegetable soup was a big bust, which is unfortunate because I have a TON of it frozen. Anybody hungry?

I'm looking forward to daddy's trial by fire next week. We'll be in Maine all week and while I'm supporting the family, he'll be playing Mr. Mom. He's fed her real food twice, and didn't find it to be a joyous experience. Having to take over for 5 days might be quite a struggle.

The nanny still comes to watch Mari for about 20 hours a week. Every so often I consider that I could put Marielle in day care for 60 hours a week for what I pay my nanny for 20 hours. But day care won't make my lunch, clean out my car, plant my garden, water my flowers, yell at my husband...and not that I want Mari out of the house 60 hours a week anyway.

We still haven't really heard any consonants, but Marielle has learned to fake cry. She's started summer school and we're anxiously awaiting some babbling now that she's wearing her new hearing aids for all waking hours.

Finally, it now costs $66.75 to mail Marielle across town. This is quite the increase since the last time we tried to mail her.

Marielle's Naps
The day I wrote about Mari's naps, she went to sleep at 3:30 pm and never woke up. After about hour four you start to wonder, "Have I been depriving her of much needed shut-eye or am I just lucky?" By hour twelve I was wondering if we had a carbon monoxide leak. I finally woke her at 2 am to feed her, then she went back down for another five hours.

My naps
My blood work came back perfect. No anemia. No hyperthyroidism. I'm just tired. And I still have not regained enough brain power to remember Linda.

Renovations
I finally found the perfect curtains (I think) for the nursery. Though the current ones are quite effective and cost efficient, they are hard to open and close. We recently put in a new mobile, one she can't reach and pull down on her head.

The inlaws bought us blinds for the bathroom as an anniversary present. We bought the kind that open from the top down so we can get sunlight and not moon the unsuspecting. My neighbors are very appreciative.

My beloved laundry room may be on its way out. The new washer spins with such force that even on the lowest setting it shakes the dishes on the other side of the house. I haven't decided what to do - move the washer/dryer to the basement and just climb stairs constantly, or attempt to sell this set and replace with crappier equipment. We have cracks forming in the walls and tile separating in the bathroom. Not sure this is the cause, but pretty suspicious.

The blog
Random visitors do not come across this blog nearly as much as they came across Cootie Countdown. Apparently pregnant moms are even more neurotic than new moms. Or they just have more time to surf. But a few posts consistently bring strange visitors to my site. Welcome, potheads and surgeon general junkies. Glad you stopped by.

The sandman finally vists

A few weeks ago I was watching my friend's son. While our kids dozed, I happened to pick up one of her books on baby sleep. In the 4-6 month old section it said Marielle should be taking two 2-3 hour naps/day. She was more on a "twenty minutes whenever the heck I feel like it" schedule. I quickly skimmed the lady's advice and decided what the heck, I would give it a try for a week.

I tried putting Mari on a schedule. A loose schedule, but a schedule. Mainly we tracked when she was sleeping and for how long, watched for signs she was tired, and tried putting her down twice during the day at suggested intervals for naps. I never on my own would have thought of putting her down to nap as early as 9:30. Or letting her try to get herself back to sleep after waking for a brief moment.

With Marielle's hearing issues I cannot comfort her just by talking or singing to her. I tried going into the nursery and rubbing her back, but seeing me just made her more agitated. Barry could not stand the crying. I told him that we were going to do it my way for a week, and if it didn't work, he could try something different the following week.

The first time she screamed her head off. I left her there, and 10 minutes later she was asleep. For three hours. Ironically, this expert lady is completely opposed to cio (crying it out) but in my skimming I didn't catch that. So maybe I got a little confused. I never let her cry more than 10 minutes without going to her, but felt it was finally time to not go to her everytime she made a peep.

I am pleased to report that we had great success. Marielle has learned to take naps. Naps that last more than 20 minutes and take place more than 3 times a week. I couldn't really complain much before since she slept so well at night and generally was a happy baby. But I really did want her to learn to nap, if only so I could get a nap now and then.

We have a great new nap routine where the nanny puts her down before leaving at 3:30 and I get at least another 2 hours of web surfing - er, I mean WORK - done before Marielle wakes up. Mari naps in the morning too, though that's more of a fight.

We are so lucky to have a babysitter that cleans our house and does work for me when Marielle is sleeping. I swear I do NOT ask her to. I would be perfectly fine with her parking her butt in front of the Tivo, or even snoozing herself, she just gets bored with nothing to do. Today she planted grass seed, pulled weeds, made my lunch and organized my garage. (That makes me feel much better about paying $14/hour for my child to nap.)

Marielle's naps have greatly improved since I read the book and since God spoke to me. He said, "Hey, idiot. Your window has no curtains on it, and it's bright as day. BECAUSE IT IS DAY! AND YOU HAVE NO CURTAINS!!!"

Yes, our entire house is curtain free. Our neighbors probably instinctively look away at this point for fear of seeing more than they bargained for. I was holding off on buying window treatments due to lack of funds, but when I saw the last 2 electric bills I decided maybe it's time to come up with a solution.

Stylish, don't you think?

Does this swim diaper make my butt look big?

We met our friends Cathy and Christina for a playdate today!(Surely I did not just use the word "playdate." Eeep.)

None of the other moms from our mommy group could join us, but we had a fantastic time with just the 2 babies and us, especially since it was Christina's first time in the pool. She was less than impressed, though mostly she was just hungry and focused on that. We'll give it another try in a couple more weeks.

Marielle grinned from ear to ear. I swear she was even kicking her feet some when I pulled her around the pool. Unfortunately she cannot wear her hearing aids near water and it's hard to sign when holding her. It's not really an issue now, but I imagine it will be when she's older and I'm trying to tell her "Stop running! Stop dunking the other kids! Do not go down that waterslide head first!!"

The weather was perfect. Who knew DC could produce such a delightful day in July. The sun was out in full force but it wasn't too hot. I was so careful to put sunscreen on every square inch of Marielle that I got distracted and never put it on my back half.

Tonight I'm feeling extra crispy - and extra stupid. Tomorrow I will be feeling extra tired as I rush to do all the work I should have been doing this afternoon. Days like today make me want to throw in the towel and be a full-time mom. But then I open the mailbox and see all the bills and come back to reality rather quickly.

What's better than having a pool? Having a friend with a pool.

Daddy, work harder so mommy doesn't have to!

Look closely

Not one but two teeth popped out today! Just barely, but I see white, so it still counts. (I swear they are there, even though it doesn't really look like it in this photo.)

Got milk?

Don't you just hate it when you drop your iphone on your baby's head while you're breastfeeding? I know I do! (Technically Barry's iphone but posession is nine tenths of the law.)

As world breastfeeding week approaches (August 1 - 7) I am seeing even more talk than usual in the blogosphere about breastfeeding. Last night I ran across a link to a photo contest and thought, "Free shirt for the winner? Count me in!"

Since Marielle is the cutest baby on the planet I will have no trouble winning, right?

I was shocked to find of the 3,000 photos from her first 6 months, I have six of me breastfeeding. Well, ok, maybe 20. But only 6 that are decent. None of which I have ever posted for public consumption despite the fact that I won't shut up about my boobs, I do a pretty good job of not pulling a Janet Jackson, and usually I consider myself to be a person who has no shame.

Just in case I don't win that contest, I have decided to start a contest of my own. Rules: you must be me to win.

Shield your eyes, because here come all the finalists in this year's contest. I worked very hard for this superpower. It's time to show it off.

Soon after birth. Wish there had been a nurse or lactation consultant around to help. It definitely did not come naturally.

Just looking at this picture reminds me of the fatigue I was still feeling at this point. I quickly learned to put my chin on my chest and fall asleep in this position while nurisng. Months later I finally learned to nurse laying down and have been snoozing through the morning feeding ever since.

Happier, more well rested days! When the pool is too cold, you find the next best thing.

Cosmo is jealous he's no longer the favorite, but he's still very protective of Marielle. From day 1 he has come to sit by my side while I nurse.

And the winner is....ME!!!

Required reading

Meet my new love, Andria. Hopefully she doesn't get the eye rolling and sighs that I got back in the day.

If you know anyone that is pregnant or may ever be pregnant, read this.

Writing this blog post took longer than my entire vacation

Last week we planned a trip out of town for a quick getaway/cheap anniversary adventure. Except apparently we each planned a different trip.

Barry's plan was to leave Friday morning and return Friday evening. (Who drives two hours each way in the same day? Not me!!) My plan was to leave Friday - as soon as I got all the work done that I put off all week - spend Friday night at the "ranch" and return Saturday around dinner time. Of course neither of us bothered to share our plan with the other.

Around 10:30 Friday morning Barry wandered past my office and said "So, we about ready to get out of here?" It was then I discovered our miscommunication. And also that Barry had scheduled a project in DC for 8:30 am Saturday morning. AND that he thinks we can just pick up and leave quickly, even with 2 dogs and a baby coming along for the ride.

I knew I had hours of procrastinating and packing and work ahead, so I forwarded Barry a list of items we had to do before we could leave town. It had 32 things on it. After completing the first two, he threw in the towel and realized we weren't going anywhere anytime soon. (And also graciously postponed his work assignment to Sunday morning so we could stay Friday night.)

I finished up my work and got to work on the to do list. Back in the good ol' days I used to pack Barry's clothes for him. Oh yeah, I'm one of them. But now with a baby to keep track of I have had to reassign that task to its rightful owner. He didn't complain, and threw together what he needed. So simple! Why didn't I think of that years ago?

20 minutes down the road I can't stand it anymore and ask, "So, did you remember to pack your clothes?" expecting to quiz him and find he forgot something, which would somehow make me feel better about everytime I pack and always forget at least one item. He really threw me for a loop when he responded, "Of course I did...didn't you get them? They were in a plastic bag at the top of the stairs."

Um, no.

Apparently my list should have had 33 things on it. We turned around and went home.

We finally made it to the ranch just as the sun was going down. We did the quick run through of the house to figure out where we were going to sleep. Then we ran out to say hi to the ponies.

I soon realized it was 9 pm, we were out in the middle of nowhere, and had brought no food. Marielle had to already gone to bed, not that we could have found a restaurant within a 30 minute drive that was still open.

Apparently the to-do list should have had 34 things on it.

I suggested horse meat burgers. Clearly I was not an Eagle Scout in a former life. I'm sure one of them could have whipped up a nice wildberry and dandelion greens salad. In the end, I scrounged together some toast with cream cheese. Mmm, what a fantastic anniversary dinner.

The next day was packed with activity. After making up for the dinner we missed by stuffing our faces at the local diner, we went to a farmers market to buy more food. Next was a random roadside we-sell-all-the-crap-you-never-knew-you-wanted store followed by a church rummage sale specializing in stuff-I-would-pay-you-to-take-if-I-owned-it.

Next stop was a local ski resort which happened to be hosting a car show and had random booths of very scary crafts for sale. (Though there was one awesome booth of wood children's toys where I scored a great deal.)

This is where Marielle tasted her first snocone, where Barry and I went summer mountain tubing for the first time, and also where Mari ate her first cracker.

(Do you feel like anxiety about starving to death has taken over our vacation and all we are doing is eating at this point? Did I mention the funnel cakes yet?)

Apparently I have a twin that lives in rural Virginia, as two different women approached us and started right in on a conversation. "Oh, is this the baby you had after Jane died?!" gushed one woman as we ate lunch. (Yes, more food.) "I haven't seen you in the store in awhile? Where are your other two daughters today?" (Um, probably still in my ovaries?)

We came home from crazyland and hopped in the pool, followed by a quick ride around the property on ATVs. Despite all this activity, we managed to squeeze in naps and still be home by Marielle's bedtime.

Amazingly enough I felt relaxed and refreshed, despite being away only 24 hours. We're looking forward to the next time some random person decides to leave town for the week and leave their door open for us to wander in. I may eat all your leftover Halloween candy (candy from October is fair game in July says me) but at least I'll wash the sheets I use. At least if my daughter pees on them. Hypothetically speaking of course.

Anybody?

Mari decides she wants to order for herself this time.

And you thought the tea cup ride made you nauseous

Dear Disney and Baby Einstein,

YOU SUCK!!!

Love,
Everyone who knows anything about music

We were all pumped up to watch our latest Netflix rental, Baby Einstein, Meet the Orchestra. I was exhausted and could barely keep one eye open, but quickly bolted awake at their unbelievable incompetence.

First of all, synthesizers? Really? Can't spend a few bucks on some real musicians for a DVD about instruments? That, while stupid, is forgivable.

However...as we all remember from 2nd grade music class:

• The woodwind section of the orchestra does contain an oboe. It does not, except under very rare circumstances, contain a saxophone or a recorder.
• A bugle? In the brass section? I might be able to forgive you for a cornet, but a BUGLE?
• YOU PUT TOGETHER YOUR TROMBONE BACKWARDS.
• If you are trying to teach a kid what a tuba is, SHOW A TUBA. Do not show a euphonium or alto horn.

Watch it and see for yourself. Write customer service. Leave a nasty review on Amazon. (There are a lot there already.)

Hope we can put aside the standardized tests for a few days of remedial music instruction to reverse the damage done to today's youth by Disney.

Good thing my baby is a genius and is already learning how to play multiple instruments.

She has also added some new instruments to her repetoire as piano is so last-month's-party-trick.

Playing dress up

Does this make my butt look big?

The front is even more disturbing than the back.

Thanks goodness the nanny is around to rescue her and dress her like a girl. Look, enough hair to hold a barrette! Barely. And yes, nanny also gave her a tube of diaper cream to play with.

43,848 hours and counting

You're not the only one that didn't get us an anniversary card. Last night Barry anxiously asked, "Do you want to exchange anniversary cards now or should we wait until tomorrow?!" Um....tomorrow? (Note to self: find 24 hour CVS.)

I knew it was coming, I just didn't realize how soon. We had been talking about presents, but when I decided nobody was getting a present, I guess I subconsciously decided nobody was getting a card.

Around our first anniversary I told Barry that for our fifth I wanted diamond earrings and to start saving his money. I now have absolutely no desire for diamond earrings. (Unless you already bought them, honey, in which case they are gorgeous and exactly what I wanted.) I honestly cannot think of anything I want him to buy for me. I would rather have the money to pay off our mountain of debt. Romantic, I know.

Here we are enjoying our wedding day FIVE years ago:

What, you didn't have pinatas at your wedding?!

On our 1st anniversary, Barry made dinner and bought me flowers. We ate every crumb of our saved wedding cake. (Delicious!) I made him a homemade card and gave him Jethro Tull tickets. (Get it? It's the PAPER anniversary??!! So clever.)

If you are wondering what happened to this anorexic lady -- well, I ate her.

(Still the 1st Anniversary.) Our maid of honor was in town visiting. I believe we had lunch at our rehearsal lunch location, one of the best buys in town, and stuffed ourselves. The picture is us eating at one of my favorite brunch locations.

The 2nd Anniversary mom was in town, and helped me spend over 4 hours making Barry a cake.

(Barry has a weird Garfield thing. And yes, that IS Garfield.) The cake tasted much better than it looked, though for me, this was a big improvement on previous attempts. It took so long to make the cake that we had to get Barry out of bed around midnight to show it to him. He probably is not wearing pants in that picture.

We celebrated the 3rd anniversary a week early in Las Vegas. Pictures are few and far between - not because we were hanging out in casinos and strip clubs, but because I was so exhausted from working the entire week before in Salt Lake that I spent most of our vacation napping. I do remember a very romantic dinner at a fabulous restaurant overlooking the Strip. I also remember being so sick from purging on rich French food that I spent the dessert course in the bathroom battling the world's worst heartburn. It takes a lot for me to miss a $12 dessert that I had to pre-order, but it just wasn't happening that night.

The fourth was spent in San Francisco. What an incredible vacation, despite the constant puking. Thanks, Marielle!

And here we are at number 5. We cannot afford another week long fantastic vacation. In fact, we probably could not afford the last one. But we really cannot now. I cannot even remember what presents we bought each other each year, other than the Jethro Tull concert (and that is one memory I would rather forget.)

One of Barry's customers offered us use of his ranch for this entire week. (If I am not back by Sunday, call the cops. Let's just say I just hope these freak situations don't run in their family.)Due to work, etc, we were unable to get away for the week. We are going to TRY to go today and just stay overnight.

I am almost hoping it's disappointing so we won't regret missing the whole week. It doesn't sound like the Ritz. For example, they told us they had a pool, though later clarified that it was inflatable. I wonder if they meant above ground? We shall see. They said there's lots of "hiking" and something about ATVs. Um, ok. How many channels do you get?

I really want to bust open the pinatas saved from our wedding. Think that might be bad luck? Think there might still be candy inside?

Dust off the baby book

Overnight Marielle has turned into a little person and not just a doll like creature that occasionally needs a new diaper.

No more lugging around the heavy car seat (which weighs about 30 lbs with baby). She is now sitting in grocery carts and high chairs. We don't have one of those shopping cart covers yet. This means Marielle has chewed her share of carts but so far no incurable illnesses. I call it "building up her immunity." (Barry is dying to get one but I cannot cave, due to my years of silent mocking of those that use them.)

Today she played her drum by herself for the first time. She has played it before with help - or by accident - but now it appears she actually knows that she can take the mallet and bang on the drum to make a sound. Before she would just eat the mallet. In fact she's getting much better at playing with all her toys rather than just trying to eat them.

Today was also Marielle's first pony ride! I was just going to make her pose for pictures, but before I knew the pony was off and running with daddy running close behind. Marielle wasn't quite as good with the riding as she was with the drumming, preferring to focus much of her attention on trying to eat the saddle.

Speaking of eating, the solid food adventure continues! My homemade baby food is turning out great and lasting a very long time. Who knew a couple of peaches could feed a kid for a week. (OK, maybe the baby chili was a bust, but the carrots, peaches and banana/oatmeal all went over well.)

Mari is also learning how to drink from a real cup, though we also throw a couple of sippy cups in the mix when mommy doesn't have time for a lot of mess. Which is pretty much always.

Gee, mommy, that's a LOT of cups but I'll do my best!

My husband has big balls...

...and he knows how to use them. That's right - we've been harboring fireworks in our basement ever since our last trip through South Carolina. Some might call them "illegal" but they are legal in some states. Just probably not ours. La la la.

Barry was pretty disappointed I wouldn't let Marielle watch the fireworks. But 9 months of vomitting and pain makes me appreciate the baby I finally have, so no dangerous fireworks for her this year. I'm really trying to make it to her one year birthday with out a trip to the you-know-where. (Starts with E, ends with R.)

After Marielle was tucked away safe in bed we went into the street and let a few rip. Barry - without my support - constructed a bottle rocket extravaganza that probably would have lit our neighbor's back yard on fire, had it not been for today's rain. La la la.

Every 4th I think about going to the National Mall and watching the fireworks. I've done this twice since moving to DC ten years ago. Actually two and a half times.

The first time was with Badger. We got there at the last second and unlike everyone else, we weren't packing a picnic for 40, enough blankets to survive a homeless winter in the arctic and lawn chairs to match. Instead we slipped in right up front near the orchestra - though we did technically have to sit under a tree and on mulch. Nature's

The second time I went to the dress rehearsal on July 3 with a guy I was dating at the same time I was dating Barry, with tickets Barry's dad had given me. Funny story, but let's move on. Anyway, 10 minutes into the rehearsal it started POURING rain , so our 2nd row seats turned out to be not the good luck we thought they were. We couldn't have been further from our car (unless we were in the 1st row).

The final attempt was when Barry and I went to meet friends at Iwo Jima and watch the action from the other side of the Potomac. Silly me. All highways and roads going anywhere near the mall were all shut down. We ended up giving up and pulling over as the fireworks began. We watched them from the far left lane of a very busy highway, along with a thousand other people doing the exact same thing.

When Marielle is older I suppose we will brave the Mall festivities. But rest assured I will make sure she is old enough to remember every second of the heat, humidity and/or pouring rain that a 4th of July in DC has to offer. Until then, she'll have to be satisfied with her daddy's big balls.

Incognito so neighbors can't give an accurate description to police?

When Babies Attack

I think I see something I like...

Mommy did a fantastic job on these flowers, don't you think? I helped.

I think I'll take some as a souvenir!

Good thing Jamie is a bride with a sense of humor!

Flower power